Sunday, November 16, 2014

In The Eye of The Storm

Sometimes life can make you feel like you're right in the middle of a horrible storm. You get thrown things at you left and right and it seems like it's never going to end. Just when you think it's over it starts up again. It makes me think of a hurricane, you get through the rough and the bad parts of it only to get to the eye of the storm. You think you are safe, everything is so calm and really great and then out of nowhere the storm starts again. What you don't know is that the second part of the storm is the way out and near the end. Getting through the storm doesn't always mean that there isn't destruction, sometimes there are pieces that are left broken that have to be put back together again. Work still has to be done to fix what the storm has torn apart. 

Yet, at the end of the storm there is also a beautiful rainbow, something great is guaranteed to come from the horrible mess that you just confronted. 
Yesterday I was driving and it was the most beautiful perfect sunny day, and out of one little cloud I saw the smallest patch of a rainbow. As I drove I stared at that little glimmer of hope my whole drive and then the song Hurricane by Natalie Grant came on the radio and I listened, really listened to the words. The whole thing gave me so much hope and I truly believe it was Gods way of telling me that He is with me and as always to be still.  
If you are in the middle of your own internal storm right now, just know that there is an end and if you keep God by your side through it all you will come out better in the end then when you first went in. 

Lyrics to Hurricane
By Natalie Grant 

You're spinning out of control again
Your life feels like a sinking ship
You're wondering how it came to this

Is it too late?
Is it too far?
For Him to reach you
And come to where you are

Step out on the edge
Don't be afraid of it
And when you feel the rain
Call His name
He'll find you in the hurricane

You're in the wreckage underneath
Your hope is buried somewhere deep
You're wondering how long it will keep?

It's never too late
Never too far
For you to reach out
And take a hold of love

Step out on the edge
Don't be afraid of it
And when you feel the rain
Call His name
He'll find you in the hurricane

Don't back down from the fight
He'll shelter you tonight
Just hold on for the change
Call His name
He'll find you in the hurricane

There's a place, there's a place you can run
When you fall, and it's all come undone
You'll be safe in the raging storm
So just let go
'Cause you are held in His arms

Step out on the edge
Don't be afraid of it
And when you feel the rain
Call His name
He'll find you in the hurricane

Ooo ooo...

And when you feel the rain
Call His name
He'll find you in a hurricane

Friday, November 14, 2014

Letting Go

Gabe has his first field trip today! He's going all the way to tucson ekkkk and Im an anxiety attack waiting to happen! 
I was going to go with him but I decided that I need to let him go do this on his own. Yet the crazy thoughts are still in my head, everything bad that could possibly go wrong. An hour drive seems like eternity when it comes to your child! 

I wish somebody would have told me how overwhelming this whole first year of school can be. He is 3 months into school and I still want to cry everytime I watch him walk towards the school, or when his teacher said "enjoy KINDERGARDEN it flys by". I want to bawl even when I think about the end of the school year. Everything is so different now that he is in school. It has made me realize that I need to appreciate my time with my girls while I still have them at home. Suddenly everything doesn't seem so overwhelming, instead it's easier to cope with Juliana's drama and her constant need for attention. 

If you have toddlers or preschoolers just enjoy them, soak in every single day that they are home with you, no matter how many cups of milk they spill or how many times they pee on your floor. It is true when they say it is such a short time. 
Excuse me while I go bawl my eyes out now. 

Ps- I tried to get the vet to put a microchip in the kids, they didn't think it was appropriate. Apparently finding a dog if it gets lost is necessary but a Child not so much. Our country's priorities are a little whack ! 😜
I opted for a note in his pocket instead with my number on it... I will work on the chip thing more later. 

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Who Cares?

Do you ever get tired of caring? Do you wish that you could just hide in a closet all day and avoid everyone and every problem and every thought? I hope I'm not the only one (well actually I hope I am the only one, I don't want anyone to feel that way). Sometimes I want to just stop caring about a person(s), stop talking to them, stop showing them that I need them. I want to cut them out, but in my cutting them out I want to not care, to not dwell on it. I want it to be easy, like they never existed. I know it sounds harsh and maybe you are thinking " wow what did this person(s) do to you?!" Nothing. They did nothing really, and it's not even really one person. There are situations I want to run away from as well. What I really want is for things to be easier, for the answers to be so clear and to be able to stop thinking so much.
I sat in my playroom yesterday for a good 30 minutes with so many thoughts running through my head that I couldn't even concentrate on one at a time. It was so overwhelming; when your head is so consumed with so much, it is exhausting.
I finally stopped myself, I told myself to be still, to take all of my concerns to God because there was no way that I was going to work it all out on my own.
So I did.
I took one thing at a time and I laid them at His feet.
I asked for
wisdom (James 1:5)
discernment (Proverbs 2:1-5)
peace (Psalm 46:10
forgiveness (1 John 1:9)
contentment (Luke 6:46-49; Matthew 7:7)
patience (Romans 12:12; Galatians 6:9)
and I even shook my fist at him at one time (not proud of that but after weeks of having something on my heart I am SO ready for Him to deal with it.)
After I was done, I had a peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). You can't understand the peace unless you have faith and you truly hand it all over to God.
I'm not saying that I'm done dealing with all of these situations, people or thoughts but I am able to separate them and as they enter my head I can get past them much easier. I am learning that if I just stay in constant communication with Him that the peace is there more often then not. I still have lots of questions, and I still need a lot of answers from Him, but having a head full of thoughts and feeling overwhelmed will not help me find those answers.
3 verses that I have been keeping nearby lately are:
"Do not conform to the pattern of this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-
His good, pleasing and perfect will."
Romans 12:2
"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up
against the knowledge of God,
and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. "
2 Corinthians 10:5
"Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.
Be self-controlled and alert."
1 Peter 5:7-8
Running from our problems or shutting people out won't solve anything. Hand it over to the only one who can truly fix it all, if you allow Him to take on the burden He will and if you will just be still He will answer you. I have to set aside myself and my views every single day and hand it over to Him, sometimes multiple times a day. I will continue to until it is all done.


Sunday, October 26, 2014

Pinterest Party

A couple of months ago our women's ministry decided to do a Pinterest themed women's fall event. I loved the idea and got right to planning! I made daily trips to hobby lobby {so I could use my 40% off coupon}, I enlisted other ladies to go to hobby lobby for me, I held friends hostage in their own homes for hours upon hours as we worked on decorations and crafts, and I prayed... A lot. 

The week before the party I had a lot of "distractions" which was good and bad. I did a lot of self evaluations, had a lot of pep talks with myself and with God. I think 2 things were going on that week: 

1. Satan was on full attack mode and 
2. God was playing baseball with me. 

Satan was really trying to distract me from the task at hand as well as take away my joy. And at the same time I felt like God was throwing me a whole lot of stuff all at once. I compare it to baseball; sometimes God threw me a perfect pitch and I would knock it out of the park, test completed and passed. Then another pitch would be a total strike out, and that one keeps getting thrown at me until I finally make contact with the ball. Lastly, sometimes it's a curve ball and I don't know if I am supposed to hit the ball or completely avoid it. It was a crazy whirl wind of a week for me. I was thankful for good friends who gave great advice and a God who stood right beside me through it all.  

Then the day of the party came and I was really nervous. It's been a long time since I have spoke in front of a crowd, so I prayed the same prayer about 50 times that day. So much so that I would even start the prayer with "sorry to say this again... I know you are tired of hearing from me but...." But it was good because it kept me connected to God all day, it reminded me over and over again that the party wasn't about me, or decorations, it was all about and for Him. When the party finally started I got an overwhelming peace. Everything was just perfect. {it's like he was listening or something... So weird!}

I watched as ladies walked in that night, some with heavy hearts, some nervous or scared, some looking a little lost. I watched them loosen up as the night went on, I saw them laugh and talk and connect with women they hardly knew. I saw them nod their heads in agreement as our speaker Hannah spoke about living the life that God has given YOU. I watched them give hugs, give encouragement and express their gratefulness for meeting that new person. I watched them walk out with light hearts, smiles on their faces and a little hop in their step. All I could think was, this is what it is all about, letting God in, connecting with women, letting go, forgetting our problems, making new friends, relaxing and giving all of the glory to God.
 I certainly am not the reason that the event was a success, God was 100% involved through the whole process and He was fully present at the party. Each and every woman that was there was exactly where they were supposed to be.  I learned SO much from this experience, with each success or failure I know that God is using me and teaching me every day. I am so excited to be on His path, in His will and on His time. Ok I could go on and on but let's get to the fun part, pictures! 
Disclaimer: I am posting all of the pictures {SO IT'S A LOT!} so if anyone see's some that they would like to have let me know.

Set Up

Welcome Table
each set of silverware came with a special message. "You are His" was my favorite. 

Food Table

Drink Table

Photo Booth

My little helper ;o)

One of my favorite things about this party was that we had some of the women decorate a table. there were 5 tables that were decorated. They were so beautiful, so original, and I just loved every single one of them!!

Table 2 By Ambrosia Clark
Table 1 by Tess Armstrong

Table 3 By Josselyn Bednarz 
and Renee Graham

Table 4 by Jamie Garcia
Table 5 by Stephanie Harrel and Lilly Dunn

Here are some fun detail shots of each table

Social Time..... 

Hannah gave us a beautiful message based on Psalm 16:6
The Boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant place; 
indeed I have a beautiful inheritance. 

Gotta have some photobooth fun!! I do regret not making this much brighter! But it was still a blast!
Out-takes included, because who doesn't love the goofy real moments?!

The last thing we did was crafts!
A fun chalkboard Christmas plate  

and a initial bag

The winners of the tea party table!  

The best thing for me about this party is that I got to meet so many amazing ladies. In the few days that have past since that night I have received texts, messages, emails and face to face contact with women telling me how much fun they had and how blessed they were that night. They have told me that they almost didn't make it there that night but were so happy that they did, they have told me that they had more fun then they ever thought they would. They have told me how much they loved the speaker and her message and just in general how blessed they were being there. It makes my heart so happy and it proves to me that it was all worth it in the end.  
I hope you all enjoyed the pictures!